Sunday, July 5, 2009

Not caring what people think

People often wonder how I came to be the type of person that doesn’t care what people think. Either that or they wonder why I feel the need to pretend like I don’t care what people think. For those who think the latter, I can assure you that it’s not an act but very much factual. For the rest, here’s my take on the topic.

Here are a few things I truly believe in my heart and live every day.

#1: I do not care what people think of me. The reason: They do not live my life. Just because someone has an opinion of you (good or bad), it does not make it a fact. Face facts. People are going to talk about you whether you like it or not. Your best friends and your family WILL talk about you behind your back. It’s how people relate to other people. Keep in mind that this is an opinion based on third party observation. You know in your heart if their words hold any merit.
#2: I do not get offended by criticism. The reason: I look at it this way: It’s possible that this person is trying to help. Especially if it’s someone close to you, they may be telling you something that you need to hear no matter how much it hurts. I absorb criticisms with an open mind and if I believe it’s something that I can use to improve myself, I work on it. Then there are people who are criticizing things about you that they do not like within themselves. Almost always when people speak badly about one another, it’s regarding something that they, themselves are insecure about.

#3 I’m not flattered by praises/awards. The reason: I do not measure my self-worth by my income, my successes or my failures. When someone praises me, I appreciate it. But I view it with the same mindset as noted in #1. That’s their opinion. I would never refuse an award because the people/organization put time/money into presenting it to me. But I don’t have a shrine to myself hanging in my home either. Awards do not make me the best. And lack of recognition doesn’t make me the worst .

#4 I have no interest in fashion. The reason: I dress how I feel like dressing. If I like it, I’m wearing it. End of story. If people like or don’t like it, that’s okay. It’s fine to have an opinion. But it won’t dictate how I dress.

#5 Don’t ask me if you don’t want to know. The reason: I don’t give false praises. When someone compliments you, I accept it by saying thank you. . I also don’t lie when I’m asked for my opinion. I will not feed into your need for approval.

#6 I stay open minded. The reason: I do not know where these people have been. I usually try to understand where they are coming from to understand their outlook or thought process. I realize that my thoughts and opinions are not the “be all, end all to the universe. I respect the beliefs of others while still holding true to my own.

#7 I don’t keep up with the Jones’. The reason: I am not materialistic. I am not jealous of things that other people have. Material items do not make you happy. Happiness comes from within. I will not buy something because everyone else has it. And I’m really not impressed with the price of one’s possessions.

# 8 I am not bitter towards others. The reason: This isn’t a competition. We are here on earth for our personal journey. You don’t know what it’s like to be someone else. While things may look perfect from your point of view, there is always more to the story. It doesn’t matter if someone has a nice house, good career, happy marriage, etc. Everyone has their cross to bear. I have enough time dealing with my own crosses to want to wish to be in someone else’s shoes and deal with theirs.

#9 I treat everyone the same. The reason: You never know who you are talking to. First impressions can be deceiving. Everyone deserves to be treated with friendliness and respect unless proven otherwise. We are all equals regardless of race, religion, social status, etc.

# 10 I live my life the way I want. The reason: I’m living my life while people are sitting around talking about it.

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